Any suggestions/comments are welcome.
Briefly explain why you are interested in engineering and particularly in the program to which you have applied. Comment, for example, on your interests and abilities; your career goals; exposure to engineering through school-related and other experiences; and discussions you have had with engineers, teachers, current or past Waterloo students. (900 character limit)
I choose Software engineering
The sheer joy of creating and the pleasure of making things that are useful to others is what interests me in engineering; it empowers me to transform abstract ideas into concrete reality. I choose Software engineering because I am of the opinion that few media of creation are so flexible, so easy to polish and rework, and capable of touching the lives of millions, Software is redefining the way society functions activities and I wish to be at the very heart of this change. I enjoy learning new languages, algorithms, and methodology and I have been actively trying to learn new skills and hone existing ones through rigorous practice and hard work. I have had the opportunity to observe and examine the work of a software engineer and the experience taught me the necessary attitude and aptitude that an engineer should possess and strengthened my decision to become one.
Holt Educational Consultant - / 10,475 3416
Rutwik , have you ever heard of the expression of "your talking a lot but not saying anything." ? That is what you did in this essay. You used the word count in a manner that did not really help you respond to the essay. Let me see if I can direct your essay in a manner that properly responds to the prompt requirements:
Briefly explain why you are interested in engineering and particularly in the program to which you have applied.
- The sheer joy of creating and the pleasure of making things that are useful to others is what interests me in engineering.
interests and abilities;
- no actual response. You are speaking of activities that you enjoy learning but you are not saying that you are proficient in these activities, which is what the essay requires as a response.
your career goals;
- no response. You need to develop one.
exposure to engineering through school-related and other experiences;
- You will do well to think of any academic exposure that you had in this field and present it. You don't have one at the moment.
discussions you have had with engineers, teachers, current or past Waterloo students.
- Who was this software engineer? What was he working on? Why were you inspired by him? What words of wisdom did he share with you that influenced your decision to become an engineer?
Respond to each requirements with a single sentence that carries a specific response that is represented in a strong manner. When the prompt says "for example", that means your essay will be helped if you represent responses to the listed requirements. That is an indirect way of telling you that you should supply these information to the reviewer because that is what will be considered along with your application.
I've made some changes, hopefully it is better than the previous version.
I have always been fascinated by computers and their working seemed mystical to me until interactions with my cousin, a software engineer, dispelled the mystery around them and sparked my passion. We used to discuss various algorithms and methodology and she would explain the program bit by bit while I would try to find faults or offer alternative solutions. My computer science teacher too played a big role; he would give me tricky problems and encouraged me to participate in a Software Development Competition where my team of 3 people created a game similar to Pac-Man. These experiences taught me the necessary attitude and aptitude that an engineer should possess developed my ability to think pragmatically and find efficient solutions to problems. I aspire to be a software engineer as I find the sheer joy and pleasure of creating something that benefits humanity to be fulfilling.
PS: Thank you so much for your advice.